Grey Skies

by A. Maya

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credits

released May 18, 2015

tags

license

all rights reserved
Track Name: A. Maya feat. Gumi - Awake
In the night,
He consumes my dreams.
His voice beckons for me
And I meet with him
In the recesses
Of my nightmares.

He holds me tight,
Tells me I'm alright.
I'm safe in his arms.
He says he'll protect me.

He is the demon that keeps
Me awake.
He is the monster that watches me sleep.
He is the hunter and I see that I'm his prey.

But he is
The only one
Who will
Ever
Love me.
Track Name: A. Maya feat. Gumi - Haunt Me (Gumi Ver.)
Once upon a time, you stood beside me
And protected me from myself.
But you've left me behind,
Crossing worlds, where I can't reach you.

I know I don't deserve you,
But letting go
Is just so hard.

Every piece of me is numb,
Yet I feel
Every drop of pain as violently
As I'd felt the first time.

Lead me back to your bed, where I
Can finally rest.
Close my eyes -
I've forseen the end

With each breath I take,
Your voice haunts me,
Taunts me.
This pain is going to overflow and pour
Out of me

Anniversaries and birthdays -
Voices, faces -
I wish
They meant nothing, but they're burned into me as
Though they're a lifetime of sins and I am
Awaiting judgment.

Wherever I turn, you are
Always there -
The things
You loved and all the things that you had hated -
They dictate -

They dictate my very being.
I am sorry that I
Couldn't be the one; you know that I tried.

All that I had ever wanted
Was for you to love me too.

With every breath that I take,
Your voice haunts
Me, haunts me, haunts me, haunts me.
The desire to hear you
Again is the only thing I
Can feel, and I can say
I would give anything to run

Back into your arms and say
That I was the one who was wrong,

But I know that's not true;
You were the one
Who was in the wrong.
Track Name: A. Maya feat. SONiKA - Abuse Me (SONiKA Ver.)
All of the people who love you
Are disposable
Because they are not him.
He is all you want and he is
All that you

Need, for he is your sun, your stars -
Your moon, your sky.
You let him become the
Meaning of your entire life.

You burn your bridges,
Though he will
Someday burn you

Use me like a rug,
Use me like a whore.
I won't be here when he
Spits on you, cheats on you, leaves you for dead.
Abuse me now, while I'm here
'Cause I'm
Running out of reasons
To stay

I didn't want to lose you, but
I'm letting go;
Can't keep covering these
Scars, pretending as though you had
Never broke
My heart, and can't keep letting you
Piece me together
So that you can just break
Me apart all over again

Oh, abuse
Me while I am still here with you.
You're pushing me to
The edge, and once I'm gone,
You will be all alone, alone.

All this pain
Will make me indestructible
So go ahead:
Strike me if you want to.
I don't care anymore; I am
Over you now

How long will it take for you
To see what you've become?
I drank from your promises,
Not knowing that they were lies.
Oh, I was in denial.

You burn your bridges,
Though he will
Someday burn you

Use me like a rug,
Use me like a whore.
I won't be here when he
Spits on you, cheats on you, leaves you for dead.
Abuse me now, while I'm here
'Cause I'm
Running out of reasons
To stay

You pissed on my heart and laughed as
You walked away.
I hope that when he throws
You off your throne, the pain will rot
Your heart and
You'll be left to no longer breathe,
As you've done to me.
I have no sympathy
For someone who uses others.
Fuck your abuse.

Then
Why does it hurt to see you broken?
You killed me and then walked away
So how can I hate you
But feel so torn
To watch you fade away?
Track Name: A. Maya feat. Gumi and SONiKA - Hollow
How many times have I wandered down
This empty street paved in my mind?
All the houses are so empty,
Their lights turned off -
This ghost town is just so hollow.
Oh, Hollow, hollow.
Oh...

Oh, I
Pick up the shards
Of the person
I used to be, oh.
Now I am so hollow.

I am sinking
In the black river
All the things that we
Could've been drown with me

The "me" in all of my memories
Is different than the "me" of now.
Which one is real?
Which one is fake?
Even if I find the answer,
I don't think it will bring me peace
'Cause I'm hollow,
Without a soul.

All of these things
That we could've been
Are sinking with me -
You can't hear our screams.

And I
Pick up the shards
Of the person
I used to be, oh.
Now I am so hollow.

I need you
But you've abandoned me, oh.
You've won this war and
You will win this war.
You were always the one who was
Much better than me,
Toying with all of my
Insecurities, oh why
Don't you look at me
And see the hollow
Person that I have become? Oh!

Oh, I
Pick up the shards
Of the person
I used to be, oh.
Now I am so hollow.

Now I am so hollow.
Track Name: A. Maya feat. SONiKA - Parting From You
You asked me why I had fallen in love with you -
Now I know:
Your smile warms
Me and I always lose myself whenever I hear your so-perfect voice
And you have
Unbound me from
All of my chains.

But no one knows the pain that
Lies beneath the
Surface of this affair.
It all seemed so
Perfect; you told me forever

And that is why I can't
Ever let you go.
If you won't come back to me,
Then I will make it so that you can't ever leave.
I'll just take your life right here and join you in eternal rest.
Track Name: A. Maya feat. Gumi - I Understand You
There have always been words
I could never say,
Always been feelings that
I could never express
I've spent my life
Alone, and I fear I
Will never find the end

Every day is a fight -
Me against myself.
Is there a winner or
Is there even a loser?
It doesn't matter;
No, you must see I
Am already dead

If you were to say there's a relief,
You'd be a liar.
I was dead from the day I was born,
Defeated before I left the cradle.
Oh...

If only to have someone say
"I understand" -
That is all that I've ever wanted
But no one does and I
Die again

Every single day is a fight -
Me against the world
But I'm not scared, no I am not scared;
I may die alone, but I will die on
My own terms

Even if someone were to tell me
That I'm not alone,
I know the truth; I know the demon's
Eyes are upon me
I was marked before
I was born
Oh...

But even if I am dead,
It's nice to hear someone say

"I am dead too.
I understand you."
Track Name: A. Maya feat. Gumi - Little Bird
What cages you here?
Little bird, I set you free.
I moved on,
Shed my skin, but you're still living in the past,
Writhing in all your self-indulgent shit.

You never
Were the goddess you built yourself to be.

Say I was bitter, but I was the one who raised you
On a pedestal,
Loved you like no other.

Little whore, I set you free.
I stopped crying over all of your lies.
I thought it was over -
God, I thought you were done.
But every single time you
Open your mouth, bullshit and lies fall out.
Yeah, every time you speak
All I hear is bullshit and lies.

Go ahead -
Say what you want, but who buried her
Insecurities in the sleazy men whom
She knew just wanted to fuck her?

Make yourself the hero if that's what you jack off to -
Yeah, if that's what you get off to.

Little whore, I set you free.
I stopped crying over all of your lies.
I thought it was over -
God, I thought you were done.
But every single time you
Open your mouth, bullshit and lies fall out.
Yeah, every time you speak
All I hear is bullshit and lies.

Say what you want, but no one will ever love you the way I did;
Despite your bullshit, I was the one who forgave you.
Keep talking shit, little whore.
Keep talking shit.

Fuck you!

Little whore, I set you free.
I stopped crying over all of your lies.
I thought it was over -
God, I thought you were done.
But every single time you
Open your mouth, bullshit and lies fall out.
Yeah, every time you speak
All I hear is bullshit and lies.

I loved you, but
You took advantage of me and feel nothing.
Keep writhing in shit, little whore.
Little whore.
Track Name: A. Maya feat. SONiKA - Leave the Cage
Your words - inconsistent,
Changing ends of the
Spectrum before I can say a thing.
This relationship is a house made up of cards.

Breaking up means goodbye;
What you mean's goodnight,
And the more you break my heart,
The more likely you'll be cut by all of the shards.

What do you want from me?
You told me to be free
So long as I don't
Leave the cage,
Don't leave the cage.
Leave the cage,
Don't leave the cage.

You say you love me,
But I know I'm just the object of your lust.
Your wants have always come before my needs
So this time
I will love me.

I wanted to be
Your only love because I've been beside you
Despite the hell you have put me through,
But she's the one
Basking in your warmth.

What do you want from me?
You told me to be free
So long as I don't
Leave the cage,
Don't leave the cage.
Leave the cage,
Don't leave the cage.

Tiny crow, why do
You stay inside of this cage when you can fly?
Wouldn't you rather go into the night
And leave your pain far behind?

I stay because my
Master feeds me and he says that he loves me.
He always tells me that he needs me
And that's more than I can say
About anyone else.

He sometimes tells me
That I matter to him, and that alone is more
Than I have ever deserved and it's
Better than being alone.

No!

It's not better than all this abuse;
His flippant "I love you"
Isn't worth the million tears I've cried in his name.

I'm about to burst, but he can't see -
No, he can't see past his
Desires and regard me as human, human.
Humanhumanhumanhumanhumanhumanhumanhumanhumanhumanhuman
Track Name: A. Maya feat. Gumi - Ideals
One day, you'll find yourself alone.
Wake up, see that I am gone,
And your empty promises
Won't bring me back.

The only person you're fooling
Is yourself; if you can say
That you don't love me, yet can't walk away -

Honey, the one who can't see through the lie
Is you.

But you can tell me
That I was too good
For you.

Say it out loud:
Say it while you're fucking her, fucking her -
Yeah, say you're at fault.
Pretend you're noble when you secretly blame me.
Yeah, blame it all on me.

The damage you've caused can never
Be repaired; I'm fucked for life.
But still, you play the victim -
Say you were right about me.

You broke the promise that was my
Only reason for living.
You killed me for the ideals
You saw in me.

Ideals I had never
Even possessed.
Track Name: A. Maya feat. SONiKA - Don't Need You Anymore
All the pain I tried to bury -
Late at night, it comes back
And tries to pull me under.
The taste of your concept -
Your transient embrace -
Yet I can't seem to want you this time.

I will survive on my own,
I will face the future without you.
All I wanted to say was that I'm doing fine
And I don't need you
Anymore.

How do you say goodbye to the
Only person who has
Ever loved you and how
Do you piece yourself
Back together when all
That you have are broken
Remnants of unhappy memories?

I will survive on my own,
I will face the future without you.
All I wanted to say was that I'm doing fine
And I don't need you
Anymore.

The days have been passing me by;
It's been two months now and
I'm slowly recovering
From the trauma you caused.
But now I'm finally
Free from the toxic love
I tried to save for ten painful years.

I will survive on my own,
I will face the future without you.
All I wanted to say was that I'm doing fine
And I don't need you
Anymore.

I'm calling just to tell
You that I'm doing fine on my own.
I haven't hurt myself since the day you
Left me, and I'm just calling
To let you know that I've finally
Looked myself in the mirror, and for the
First time, I didn't cry.
It's been two whole months and I can say -
I can say that I'm better without you;
I'm free.

I am going to survive
On my own.
I'm calling just to say
That I don't need you.
I'm calling to tell you
I don't need you.
Track Name: A. Maya feat. Gumi and SONiKA - Blood and Wine
I want to hear you say that you love me, oh -
The only thing that I long for.
Ah, words that taste of blood -
Words that taste of wine.

How can I love you
But hate you
All the same?
If the knife falls
On you,
Let it fall on me.

Cut me open and tell me you
Hate me.
All this pain reminds me that I'm alive
And that I still love you.

It feels so good -

The way you
Take my soul,
Drinking from my life
'Til I die
In your place.

One day, I'll wake up
But for now,
I will sleep.
So take my life,
Take my pain -
Free me from your name.

Words that taste of blood -
Words that taste of wine.